tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566317761793185393.post8386722761863051591..comments2023-07-01T00:33:55.165-07:00Comments on Ben Efsaneyim: Sorting The Wheat From The ChaffBen Efsaneyimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16001682865274251483noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566317761793185393.post-19487135151147087922015-05-04T22:13:45.741-07:002015-05-04T22:13:45.741-07:00Those are great questions that illustrate what I w...Those are great questions that illustrate what I was getting at in the post. <br /><br />It is the not knowing the intentions of people who ask these questions that makes these kinds of encounters so problematic. We don't know if such an encounter is going to lead to a life-long friendship or a beating with a baseball bat. <br /><br />The key is to be open but prepared. Expect any outcome ranging from a life-long friend to a potential hate-crime. But I think we have to be present with these interactions and be willing to be the one who defines their significance and nature. <br /><br />In other words, we should try to come away from these ambiguous interactions with a clear understanding of what the person in front of us intended. <br /><br />I have responded to many such situations with the simple question like....."Why do you need to know that?". If the intention is of the interrogator is innocent, then usually they back-flip with embarrassment and will say that they did not mean anything by it. If the intention was cynical and bigoted, then the response is often anger and offense on the part of the interrogator.<br /><br />Either way, I found out where some of these people are coming from and didn't have to worry about it later.Ben Efsaneyimhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16001682865274251483noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566317761793185393.post-74686550482278326532015-05-04T14:50:17.661-07:002015-05-04T14:50:17.661-07:00My response to questions of ancestry is to point o...My response to questions of ancestry is to point out that such questions are offensive and insulting depending on who is asking. If it is a fellow Asian, then I have no problem with answering. I also don't mind when I am asked out of romantic interest because the interest is genuine. But when a complete stranger asks out completely out of the blue I can see no good reason for it. What would the answer gain them? Does it provide some more specific stereotype they can use to dismiss your individuality? I am not sure of the best method of dealing with such a question, but I do know that am not going to let ignorance go unchecked. Apollyonnoreply@blogger.com